Inspirational thought of the week:

Now the race has begun
And here comes the pride on your back
The heartache goes inside
My tears are held back
They try not to fall
My heart is not working
True love scratches for another
The race is on and it’s like heartaches
And the winner loses everything
– “The Race Is On” by George Jones

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Here at the Bottom 10 headquarters, located in the same room as the computer server that holds all the drafts of Lane Kiffin’s backup stock of tweets, we’re at the forefront, hitting the gas pedal like Ross Chastain at Martinsville Speedway. There is only one lap left in the race, which is the 2022 American football regular season, and the white flag has been taken down.

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For those of you who don’t follow NASCAR, we should explain that the white flag does not mean surrender, it means the end of the race is imminent and the next flag shown will be checkers. In other words, there is a week left before the announcement of the champion. But it’s not the Valleydale Meats 500 either, is it? This is the Lower 10. And in this world, everything is a flag of surrender, no matter how hard any person – even the 12th person – disguises it as something else.

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My apologies to Cornelius Tacitus, E. King Gill, former Tennessee State guard Joe “The Turks” Jones and Steve Harvey, here are the rankings of the last 10 players after week 12 and through Thanksgiving.

1.Umess (1-10)

The Minutemen lost their second straight Pillow Fight of the Week after their close victory in Arkansas State broke the heart, and they performed well in front of dozens of fans at Kyle Field, losing to Texas A&M 20–3 after only 10 points behind. most of the second half. This is despite the fact that at least two of their players spent the entire game hearing nothing because the Corps of Cadets decided to reenact the Battle of Lexington and Concord before the game.

2. Color-spirit (1-10)

Speaking of the American Revolution, Washington took the win over Buffalo, a win frozen by a fourth-quarter TD catch, pulled by a receiver named Sam Adams II, of course.

3. Akronmonius (1-9)

Speaking of the Buffaloes, Akron was supposed to be playing in the Buffalo Bulls Not Bills, but apparently Arendelle’s Elsa is either a Zips graduate or has some money in the last 10 title race because someone dropped 77 inches of snow on the city above the city. weekend and postponed the game indefinitely.

4. USA(not C)F (1-10)

Speaking of bulls and inclement weather, the USF lost 48-42 at the Tulsa Golden Hurricane circuit. It was just a warm-up for the annual Thanksgiving weekend hyperactive rivalry with UC(not S)F, also known as the War on I-4. I’m not entirely sure if the Black Friday 2017 edition of this game is ever really over, just like I’m not entirely sure if anyone will ever really get off I-4 once they get on it.

5. Good old Rocky Slop (Ugh!) (9-2)

After the attack on Pearl Harbor, stunt pilot turned Air Force General Jimmy Doolittle trained his legendary raiders for their bombardment of Tokyo near Columbia, South Carolina near Williams Bryce Stadium, home of the South Carolina Gamecocks. . A fleet of B-25s bombed the same patch of land over and over and over and over again, refueled, and then bombed again and again and again and again, day after day, day after day. Saturday night in Columbia, as USC climbed 63-38, the ghost of Dolittle could be heard saying, “Damn, roosters, stop it.”

6. North via Northstern (1–10)

The Northwest now feels like the Northwest of the 1980s as it experiences the longest losing streak in the country, a slump that has reached nine losses. According to the magical and creepy Sportzshala FPI precision computers, there is an 81.7% chance that the artists formerly known as Ill-ugh-noise will increase this streak to 10. If that happens, the Mildcats will throw a huge resume on the table. The selection committee top 10 next week. And given that this table is really just an old TV tray we found at a trailer park “real estate auction”, there will come a time when it will collapse and spill Netti Light in the lap of committee chairman Charlie Weiss.

7. Wow Mexico (2-9)

The invasion of the Lower 10 Mountain West is reminiscent of Lando Calrissian’s words at the Battle of Endor when he asked, “I wonder what those Star Destroyers are up to?” Only instead of giant, weapon-laden spaceships, it’s a fleet of recycled Trailways buses. The no-bos crashed that party with eight straight losses, and a tenth end-of-season loss to Colorado State’s bottom 10 pending listers could be just what Mexico needs to pull off their own version of Holdo’s maneuver.

8. Don’t go (2-9)

Meanwhile, the Oof Pack also lost nine in a row, having already rectified their loss at Colorado State in week five. Now, all of a sudden, we’ve got the pillow fight of the week of the year of the century coming up, which isn’t just a few weeks ago, but now could be the game that will make the biggest impact on the final top 10. Against who? Or whom? Or who? Or what my English teacher would tell me to write here but I’m too excited to remember the correct grammar?

9. unlevel (4-7)

These guys! Our old friends from the world’s largest Roomba made it into this ranking for the first time this season. Is it unusual for a team with four wins to be here at the end of the season? Yeah. But that’s what happens when you slide into the end of the season like I did when I lived in Connecticut thinking I could drive my Pontiac Grand Am on ice. The Other Rebels’ losing streak just reached six thanks to a 31-25 loss in the top 10 of the season Ha ha ha ha.

10. Agricultural and Mechanical College of Texas (4-7)

Okay, first of all, you won’t come out of the bottom 10 after having a hard time beating a top/bottom team at home, even if you were only in the coveted fifth place, and especially when you started falling in the preseason top 10. Secondly, you completely remove your lack of style points when you fire a cannon at a couple of guys praying before the game, as well as at this transfer of shirtless towels. And finally, did I just do this to cheer up the people at College Station because it’s Thanksgiving and the evil SEC fans in my mailbox are as delicious as dip and those baked marshmallows scraped off top of a sweet potato pie and eaten all by themselves like candy? You can’t see me right now, but I say “Gig ’em” with a thumbs up. And yes, it’s a baked marshmallow on the tip of my thumb.

Waiting list: Arkansau State, Colora Spirit State, Ha-Why-Yu, Los-and-Anna Tech, Charlotte 3-and-9ers, Old Minion Spirits, Northern Evil Noise, Stampford, In Rutgers, No Braska, Temple of Doom , your drunk uncle takes a turkey leg and eats it in front of you, talking about politics.